November 17, 2015

thankful list #3



+ i am thankful to feel everything as deeply as i do. this weekend, i wept after hearing the casualty numbers in paris. (on the way to the movies, no less.) i felt real, genuine anxiety for a friend preparing to take the GRE, and cried again as my husband gave her a blessing. my insides lit up completely with christmas magic as i watched the traverse mountain christmas tree be lit. i feel so many things is a very complete way, and although sometimes it's exhausting, i am thankful to be emotionally sensitive - it connects me to those around me. my human experience is flawed, but being emotionally alive makes it always feel so fulfilling.

+ i am grateful to have witnessed an outpouring of love on social media after what happened in france this weekend. i am grateful for the knowledge that good will always be greater. (& grateful that my cousin serving in paris right now is accounted for & safe!)

+ i am thankful for cold winter air that feel clean and crisp inside your lungs. i am thankful that snow is so pretty, even if it makes driving a nightmare.

+ i am thankful that my dad's cancer has a high survival rate. !!!!!

+ i am thankful for compliments - receiving them (mila told me i was the most "festive" person she knew and it literally made my life) and giving them. (making a goal to compliment three people a day has significantly contributed to my overall happiness.)

+ i am grateful that jordan can grow a full, thick, sexy beard and i am grateful that he is almost graduated from byu so he never has to shave it EVER AGAIN. his facial hair kills me.

+ i have kinda already shared this sentiment, but at friendsgiving last night it popped into my head again. i am so grateful for our life here in utah. it is full of way more good friends than we deserve, and i am grateful that the thought of leaving them instantly brings me to tears. i love that so many of those friends have become family, and i hope that we can create relationships in SF as special as the one's we have here.

+ after seeing an art exhibit dedicated to her last week, i am feeling especially grateful for my heavenly mother and for the times that i have felt her influence.

+ i am intensely grateful to be a woman, and for the opportunity it gives me to create what "woman" means to me. i am thankful for my femininity and how it defines me in so many beautiful ways. i am thankful to be a mother someday.

+ although i don't have a place to call "home" per say since my family moved after i left for college, i am grateful that they ended up in boise. it is the most magical place! i am grateful that i have grown to love it (was not exactly thrilled at the thought of idaho when they first told me) and i love that it holds so much sentiment for my husband.

November 12, 2015

moab 2015.

after talking about it for months, we finally got our butts down to moab! (FIRST TIME for me!) the original plan was camping, but when we found out the temperatures were going to dip below 20 each night, we quickly said NOOOOOPE & booked a hotel. shoutout to the baldwins for coming with, even though you just went a month ago. i'm so glad you did!

we hiked delicate arch on saturday (hello, what a view) and then sunday, adventured around fiery furnace. although delicate arch was incredible, fiery furnace took the cake. it felt like being on another planet. we  saw like, 4 other humans while inside the park, and it felt like we were charting mars, just the six of us. the park is full of arches and rock formations, and without any designated trails, you pretty much just treat it as a red-rock corn maze, wandering in and hoping you can find your way out. it is so cool. i wish the cool-factor translated to pictures, but everyone just needs to go see it for themselves!

a few memories worth mentioning:

+ the boys kept running off to climb rocks and dubbed themselves "adventure squad." when the girls charted the way, alex said, "we're the girl adventure squad! G-A-S." and then we all started laughing. 

+ on the drive down, there was a massive coke-spilling incident that ended up in diet coke being flung about the entire front seat. jordan and i just sat in the back, laughing so hard we were crying, while dillon and alex tried to decide who's fault it was. so hilarious.

+ jumping on the hotel beds and abusing snapchat's new "speed up and slow down" video feature by singing songs to ourselves. 

+ how good our saturday night pizza was after waiting over an hour for it. 

+ getting a picture from boy alex (there's a boy alex and a girl alex in this group) the day after we got home. it's of jordan, from behind, straddling a crevis and peeing into it. i'm embarrassed to even admit this, but i cracked up. boys will be boys. (you're welcome for not sharing that photo here.)

now here's a million photos. (also, i have no idea why i thought it was cool to make peace signs in so many of these pictures? my bad.)





i wish i knew what was happening here. 



my girl adventure squad.






a few crevice group selfies, courtesy of the long-armed husbands. 

just a few test shots for our album cover. (i'll spare you our attempts at coming up with a band name, they were pretty cheesy.)

November 10, 2015

thankful list #2





+ i am thankful that fall has lasted as long as it did! i am so thankful to be greeted by rich, buttery yellows every time i pull into my neighborhood or drive around big-tree streets. (fingers crossed the colors survive the snow!)

+ i am thankful for so many christlike friends - the kind of friends where you think, "why do you guys hang out with us again?" because they are just SUCH good, pure people. i am so grateful for their examples in my life.

+ i am thankful for UTAH! we were able to hike around moab this weekend, and just. like. wut??people come from all over the world to experience the expanse of red rocks and arches, and they've been sitting in my backyard for the past three years. i wish i had gotten on this sooner! but utah, you are the promised land. the mountains here, the red rock, the dessert, the changing leaves and the big fluffy snowflakes and downtown salt lake. this is the most magnificent place.

+ i am grateful for a love of literature and books and reading. i love the quote, “a reader lives a thousand lives before he dies. the man who never reads lives only one.” i really feel as though my mind, my imagination, my creativity, & my life as a whole has been enriched more by reading than almost anything else.

+ i am grateful that jordan tickles my back every time that i ask.

+ i am grateful that my friends have cute, squishy babies for me to squeeze and obsess over until i have my own. i am grateful they are not creeped out that i have a ton of pictures of their kids saved on my phone.

+ i am grateful for my testimony of the church, and for my husband's example of refusing to be swayed by the opinions of the world. i am grateful that it brings me peace in times of turmoil. i am grateful to feel firm in my knowledge, and i am grateful for that guiding force in my life.

+ i am grateful for pedicures, because i don't take good care of my feet on my own.

+ crystal light energy packets, because what would my days look like without those?


+ i am grateful that i am forced out of bed pretty early on weekdays. i get a lot more out of my days when i don't waste them sleeping in, and there is something about that quiet, damp morning air. it's full of energy yet it feels so calm. (but this is my prayer that we never, ever have to do 8am church again.)

November 5, 2015

halloweenie weekend.

sometimes i'm a little guilty of overlooking halloween as a the last roadblock on our way to the holiday season. but this year i tried to get sufficiently excited and keep my candy intake at a non-bloating level - it turned out great!

we had two friends throw two parties (one friday, one saturday, that worked out miraculously for us) and they were both smashing successes!

our friends kristin and garrett had us come over and help set up before their party started, and eventually they went & changed into their costumes. when they walked out, i could NOT stop laughing. 

garrett dressed up as forrest gump, complete with his pants hiked up real high, sneakers, and a box of russel stover chocolates in hand. 

kristen waddled out on her knees as lieutenant dan with an eye-liner drawn mustache. (her hair is the same length as the actually character's hair, it was perfect.) 

they won best costume award in my book. 

after checking literally a dozen stores for plastic fangs, we had to settle for hillbilly play teeth in our donuts. i think they turned out pretty cute.




on friday, i bounced a little early from party #1 to attend the last hour of madi's wedding reception aka 90's dance party. 

YOU GUYS. i forgot how much i miss dancing! 

i drank a five hour energy previous to walking in, and so for the first half an hour i was just going nuts, completely covered in sweat. probably dancing like a total maniac. 

i dread seeing the reception video eventually (my dancing feels cool, but it definitely does not look cool) but my girls + a dance floor is such a good time. 




and it should be noted that on sunday, we had absolutely nothing to do. nothing! (besides church and home teaching for jordan.) 

does anyone else feel like sunday sneakily becomes their busiest day of the week? 

between family dinner and church assignments and friend get togethers our sundays are sometimes exhausting. 

but on this day, we took a long nap, went on a few walks, i made jordan watch father of the bride with me (he didn't like it......wth...) and we even made ourselves breakfast for dinner. it was relaxing + rejuvenating, and a perfect way to end a weekend of partying. 

November 3, 2015

thankful list #1


last week, jordan and i had this long discussion about how lucky we have been in our lives. there were many examples to prove this point - how we stumbled upon each other without really looking, fell in love, and have a wonderful life together. how jordan decided to do banking last minute, got an offer, and ended up on a career path that is exactly what he wants. how we were blessed with scholarships that helped us finacially, and have always found good employment. how there have been no major tragedies recently in our lives, and how we have always been blessed with good friends and a fulfilling social life.

we have had our fair share of trials, do not get me wrong. i never mean to come off like my life is perfect. is SO is not. but there is a lot of good happening in my life and not enough recognition from me. when i take a second to think about it - is this all really fair?? am i appreciating it all enough? i voted no, viola! november is thankful month, so i decided to mend my ungrateful heart and really push myself to ponder my blessings, and seek them out from places less traditional. a lot of these thankful points will be personal and i will keep those to myself, but i wanted to share a few each tuesday this month - and encourage anyone else who feels the need to participate!

so here we go, installation one of thankful tuesday:

+ obviously jordan has to come first, because what would my life even be without my husband?? i am so grateful for him that i am often driven to tears in my personal prayers when i thank heavenly father for letting me have him. i am thankful that he is so loyal & that the real things are what matter most to him. i am thankful that he never settles & is always expecting more out of himself and our life together. i am thankful that he takes his priesthood role seriously, and i am thankful that he approaches his role as husband with a sacredness and dedication that i totally don't deserve. he is my whole world and my greatest gift.

+ i am grateful for my mental heath. after seeing so many dear friends and family members bravely battle depression (and do so with a measure of grace and determination that astounds me) i am grateful for the ability to bounce back from my down days. i am grateful, at this time in my life, to see things as they are and to always have the good outweigh the bad.

+ i am grateful that i haven't lost my child-like, completely over the top excitement for the holidays and the magic they hold. i am grateful i still get butterflies before putting up the christmas tree or seeing the nutcracker. i am grateful that i still tear up every time i hear "have yourself a merry little christmas." the christmas parties that happens inside my head bring me so much joy!

+ i am thankful for a love of being active, and for a body that allows me to push it and beat it up a little at the gym. i double whammied myself on saturday (a full spin class followed directly by a full power pump class) and although i was creaky and achy all day sunday, i was so aware of my body and the lengths to which it can go. (don't worry, i rewarded my hard workouts with in n out.)

+ I AM SO GRATEFUL MY SISTER LIVES IN PROVO. we have the best time together. that girl does my soul good.

+ i am thankful for my bed. the last few nights as i sink into my memory foam and pop one leg up for my flamingo-style sleeping position, i have had the thought enter my head that, not everyone has this. not everyone has a warm sanctuary to sleep in on a cold night. not everyone has a soft mattress and a giant comforter to tuck under their chin as they fall asleep. and i am grateful that i do!

+ i am grateful that gossip girl is on netflix, and i am grateful for illegal websites where i can download the mindy project.

+ cheese. cheese plates. macaroni and cheese. grilled cheese. mozerella cheese. cheddar cheese. pepper jack cheese.

+ i am thankful for spellcheck. (but never auto-correct!)

+ i am grateful for harry potter - it has brought me friends, taught me life lessons, and i love always having a favorite series to come back to in-between other literary ventures. cracking open one of those books or turning on a movie feels like coming home.  #HP4LYFE

+ i am grateful for professors who, although they drive me crazy with some of their left-wing agendas, challenge me and make me question everything i have ever thought to be true. i am thankful for the ways in which i am pushed to be a more critical thinker.

+ i am grateful that i feel so heart-broken at the thought of leaving provo. i am so blessed to have so many incredible, perfect people here that will make leaving SO freakin hard.